Selective 'Hello' Sayers
Who are they?
They can be described as the familiar faces we see in our everyday lives (e.g. in the neighbourhood; workplace or gym) or people that you have met through friends or acquaintances who conveniently go out of their way to avoid saying, “hello”.
Some people have turned it into a science, using electronic gadgets or other personal objects as tools of distraction, for example, attaching a mobile phone to their head, in an attempt to make themselves appear aloof or unaware to their surroundings. For others, it is a tactical game of cat and mouse - it is safe to assume that everyone appreciate's a good chase - with the underlying assumption that ambivalence will give them the upper hand. It is the preface of avoidance, from the more the more subtle approach of shying away from making direct eye contact to those extreme scenarios, like deliberately altering directions or crossing to the other side of the street... but really, is any of this necessary just to avoid saying a friendly, "hello"?
What is really going on? Are we are moving towards a world or disconnect or is this simply a new beharioural phenomenon, an ego-centric dynamic, that is to be expected and accepted?
What's more, it seems that people are inherently becoming disconnected from the simplest of human emotions, like empathy and compassion, because they will not go out of their way to help those in need. Why? Well, my guess is that this could be a statement of their 'me first' decree - a way of shielding themselves by way of self-protectionism or self-preservation.
As a genuinely friendly-person-by-nature, I try to say hello to everyone whenever or wherever I am. Really, what’s the harm? It makes no difference what kind of mood I am in, whether it be good or rotten, I'll still say "hello" (although in the latter case, I will not go out of my way to say more). I believe that saying "hello" may help elevate a person’s spirits and/or inspire their emotional and/or mental well-being - both acknowledgement and validation-of-sorts are important for the human psyche.
Saying "hello" .... it doesn't cost anything and it's so simple to do.
They can be described as the familiar faces we see in our everyday lives (e.g. in the neighbourhood; workplace or gym) or people that you have met through friends or acquaintances who conveniently go out of their way to avoid saying, “hello”.
Some people have turned it into a science, using electronic gadgets or other personal objects as tools of distraction, for example, attaching a mobile phone to their head, in an attempt to make themselves appear aloof or unaware to their surroundings. For others, it is a tactical game of cat and mouse - it is safe to assume that everyone appreciate's a good chase - with the underlying assumption that ambivalence will give them the upper hand. It is the preface of avoidance, from the more the more subtle approach of shying away from making direct eye contact to those extreme scenarios, like deliberately altering directions or crossing to the other side of the street... but really, is any of this necessary just to avoid saying a friendly, "hello"?
What is really going on? Are we are moving towards a world or disconnect or is this simply a new beharioural phenomenon, an ego-centric dynamic, that is to be expected and accepted?
What's more, it seems that people are inherently becoming disconnected from the simplest of human emotions, like empathy and compassion, because they will not go out of their way to help those in need. Why? Well, my guess is that this could be a statement of their 'me first' decree - a way of shielding themselves by way of self-protectionism or self-preservation.
As a genuinely friendly-person-by-nature, I try to say hello to everyone whenever or wherever I am. Really, what’s the harm? It makes no difference what kind of mood I am in, whether it be good or rotten, I'll still say "hello" (although in the latter case, I will not go out of my way to say more). I believe that saying "hello" may help elevate a person’s spirits and/or inspire their emotional and/or mental well-being - both acknowledgement and validation-of-sorts are important for the human psyche.
Saying "hello" .... it doesn't cost anything and it's so simple to do.
posted by D-Rocks at 10:36 AM
9 Comments:
i don't know who you are but i want to say that i enjoyed reading some of your stuff!
if i understand correctly, when you say "egocentric" are you implying that the real lookers in this world interpret friendliness to be a come-on?
-Krista, (Virginia, U.S.A)
Hello D-Rock great stuff but kinda hard to read, should think about changing the font, layout, etc.. cheers
To: Anonymous #1
Yes, attractive people often assume they're being hit on, although it really shouldn't matter. If we take anything we've learned from our childhood, it's how to be polite. So someone thinks you're attractive... there's no harm in that, right?
To: Anonymous #2
A couple of other people mentioned they were experiencing similar problems (i.e. difficulty to read). I've looked into it and I believe the problem may stem from your computer's monitor - chances are, it has a low resolution (e.g. 800 X 600).
I appreciate your suggestion(s), but due to the theme and nature of the writings of my blog page, I've decided to leave it as is.
Thanks for the comment!
~D-Rocks
Hello, Bonjour, Shalome, Konishiwa.
It's all about the mood. Its okay to shy away from people every now and then, but not to make a habit of it.
Love the blog!
Melissa :)
While for the most part I would agree with what you say...there are those who feel that sometimes they don't have nothing more to share beyond "hello" or they are in no frame of mind to exchange...no excuse but a phobia or self-conscious decision if you will.
So you mean...
No one seems to care as much
No time to smile, laugh or cry as much
Have we lost the touch that means so much
Have we lost the human touch
No one wants to be alone
To walk or talk and sleep and weep alone
Have we lost the touch that does so much
Have we lost the human touch
Touch me now and let me know
Hold me tight so i can go
Through this misery unafraid
And really knowin' what lift is all about
No one wants to live alone
Who wants to smile, laugh or cry alone
Have we lost the touch that means so much
Have we lost the human touch
Yes, yes, yes
Pause for thought.
Panhandlers, street urchins, grubbies: the homeless. They can be more or less visible. Some sit stooped inside doorways bearing starved looks of resign and defeat. Those with some fight left, rant of injustices, real and otherwise, to anyone and no one passing by. (The same can be said for some of the people I work with, but that's another story.) Others still, sit quietly and plead for money. In these instances, I normally shake my head, offer an sheepish smile and move on. I am sure the awkwardness of my gestures betray the guilt I feel inside. Truth be told, in this case some feeling is better than none. Fact is, with out some personal connection, the homeless become a completely alien population to me.
Yesterday I had an experience that gave me pause for thought. I was walking down the street when a woman called out, "Spare some skdfhy". Thinking I'd heard this same line several times already, I delivered my usual reply without skipping a stride. The woman called out again, in a louder voice this time: "What did I say?"
Is she talking to me? Shit, she is. Now I have to stop. Okay think: What did she say? I hesitated, and then muttered, "Uh, I think you asked if I could spare some change". "No", she spat, her words ripe with anger. "I asked if you could spare some sanity. So.........Can you?" God, she actually expected an answer. And, more to the point, I didn't have one. My thoughts kept leading me back to the same basic question: What sanity? My life is driven by a seemingly inexhaustible need to be faster, smarter, thinner, richer, better. What's more, I live in a world that is caught in a giant self-devouring cycle that is perpetuated by the continuous striving for all things newer, nicer, and more advanced. I inhabit the cult of more. Sadly or not, others need to fail so that I can achieve. That is how the game is played most of the time.
I thought about it for a moment longer, and finally said, "My answer is still no. And, it's not because I don't want to. It's because you don't want what I've got." To my surprise, the woman's face relaxed some and then she actually smiled. And in that brief moment the illusion of distance between our lives was breached by the simple common understanding:
At what cost, our sanity? I had to smile.
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